Extra Content

This page is for some of the old content that was created for my social media that I loved too much to lose. xo

Remember that your thoughts and behaviours are what shape your reality and majority of thoughts and behaviours are learned from those who raised us (unless consciously changed). So when you say “depression runs in my family” or any other Mental Health illness runs in your family you are WRONG. The people in the generations above you in your family only suffered because of the same behavior and mindset traits they have passed on to you!
Someone has to break these generational curses. Someone has to unlearn the toxic traits and learn healthier ones. Someone has to teach the next generation differently.
Let that person be you.

“Haleema how are you always so calm?” “Haleema how are you always so positive?” ..
Well my beautiful humans, there are a lot of factors that contribute to my general state of mind, but I’ve put together a little summary for you with some of the key practices I use daily to keep myself in a positive state throughout the day.

People ask me “how can you know if someone is going to kill themselves?” The answer is that you don’t. Sometimes Suicide can be pre-planned but sometimes the feeling is a sudden urge after a long period of suppression. That’s why the best thing you can do is educate yourself on general warning signs not just related to Suicide but also the warning signs of Mental Health deterioration. That way you can step in earlier before things escalate to the extreme.

These are some of the warning signs relating to mood, behaviour and characteristics that I’ve put together and I hope this can give you a better understanding of things to look out for.

Please remember that anyone around you could be going through anything. So be mindful, be conscious, and most importantly, PLEASE BE KIND.

Two years ago today I tried to end my life (again). Two years ago today I was ready to leave everything behind and I lay there while my friends, family and the police were tirelessly trying to find me. Two years ago today I was tired, I was numb, I just didn’t want to do it anymore, I didn’t want to live another second in this cruel, horrible world that kept making bad things happen to me.
I used to wake up and wish that I hadn’t opened my eyes, and now I wake up in the morning and thank God for giving me another opportunity at life. So if you feel anything close to how I used to, let me be the one to tell you that things do change. Things do get better.
But it starts with you. Everything starts with you. Believe you will get there, visualise yourself getting there, and be ready to do the damn hard work it takes to actually get there.
Today I live in a way that I couldn’t even think or dream about before because my mind could not even comprehend the thought or idea of me actually being happy, healthy or successful in any way whatsoever, and the same can happen to you, I promise.
Happiness comes from within, and one day you will have the strength and the self-love to create it, but until that day comes, I’ll make sure you feel it from me.

This is my reminder to you that no matter what anyone has ever said to you in your life, no matter what the voice inside your head tries to tell you, no matter what you think.. you matter, you are important, your feelings are valid, you don’t need to be more like someone else and you deserve every bit of happiness in the world.. YOU ARE ENOUGH.

Remember when we used to sing this song when we were kids? Oh how it could not have been more wrong!

The impact of words is so much more intense and long-lasting than that of physical violence and this misconception we had as children has played a big part in the development of Mental Health issues because most of these illnesses develop from incidents that occurred during childhood/school. A lot of kids are not that mindful of the words they say (and kids can be brutal to each other) !

It’s too late to change the story of when we were kids, but let’s do better for the next generation and generations to come. Let’s educate kids on the importance of their words and how their words can impact someone’s life and teach them how to speak with love.

Let me tell you a long story short.. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
• Bullied for my appearance throughout my school life
• Severe insecurities formed – wanted to look like anyone but myself ⠀⠀⠀⠀
• Spent my teenage years straightening, thinning & chemically destroying my hair to look like the girls at school who were liked by everyone
• Aged 19 for the first time someone told me naturally curly hair was beautiful & my heart sunk
• By then I’d lost most of my hair & what remained was straight, dead, dry & brittle
• Despite the condition of my hair improving over the years after I decided to leave it alone, the underlying issue (my lack of self love) had yet to be dealt with
• My previous partner told me his ex girlfriend had better hair than me because it was more curly (out blew my insecurities again)
• By the age of 23 not only did I hate myself but I had begun to compare myself to every woman I saw who had curly hair

You see, the relationship I have with my hair has been an extremely negative one throughout my life and therefore when I look at my hair or think about my hair I only feel negativity. My hair is full of negative energy. So just like people move abroad and have fresh starts, or change their diets and have fresh starts, I wanted to shave all my hair off & have a fresh start. (Disclaimer, yes hair does grow back). As I shaved my hair off bit by bit, I removed all the negative energy & feelings associated with my hair, I removed all the insecurities I have ever felt because of my hair, I removed the doubt that my natural state is not beautiful & not only that, but seeing myself with no hair, in my rawest form, I couldn’t stop smiling. Today I had my biggest breakthrough, I realised that the love I lacked for myself for 24 years of my life, has finally formed, & I could not be happier.

Shaving my hair was never about my appearance, it was never about the validation of other people, it was all about me, it was all about letting go of every negative feeling, thought & memory I associated with my hair, changing how I feel about myself, & acknowledging that the only validation I need is from myself & my creator, & if my creator loves me no matter what I look like, then so should I.

It was officially one year ago today that I took that huge step and shaved all my hair off. Can you believe how fast time flies?!
For those who didn’t know me when this happened, I did this so I could learn to love myself in my rawest form. Fresh into my recovery after being discharged from a mental health unit I did this so I could spend less time being anxious over my physical appearance and put more focus into working on my mental health and emotional well-being. I did this so I could strip off all the negative energy and memories attached to my hair. I did this to empower myself, to create a fresh start and mark the start of a new chapter.✅
I never regretted it and I never will.
Instead of hiding my head when I experienced anxiety, I sat down and sat with the emotions I was feeling, I talked myself through it and fed myself with empowering conversation just like I would if I was supporting a friend. I practiced Self Love when it was hard so that today I find it easy.👏🏽
I fell in love with the process of watching my hair grow back and created a whole new relationship with it full of love and gratitude regardless of what it looks like and how it grows back.
Not only that, but through this process I’ve been able to learn to love the rest of me too. My physical appearance as well as my inner self, I fell in love with who I am, unconditionally.💚
It may seem small to someone else, but to me this is huge. Thank you for being a witness to part of my journey, the love and support means the world x